You ever have those days where you wonder if something is really worth it? If the track that you are on is really worth the effort and trouble? I had one of those moments recently where for a brief moment, I wondered if this whole Christ thing, if this whole leading 20 somethings was even worth it. It wasn’t that I was struggling with sexual sin or wanted to revert back to my BC (before Christ) days or anything like that. I came face to face with the reality of just how hard being a follower of Christ really is. When I gave Him my ashes in exchange for His beauty, I never thought I would have to make some of the decisions that I’ve had to make. Giving up sex was easy. Turning away from porn was easy. Cutting out certain music, TV, and movies was easy. Being sold out for Christ was easy. Yet, I found myself having to stare into the reality of having to choose between pleasing people and pleasing God.
People vs. God? God should win hands down right? Easier said than done until you are in that position. I guess in the two years, my devotion to God has never really been tested. At least not in my mind cause before I never struggled with trying to “decide” what the right course of action was. Do I choose pleasing a person or pleasing my Savior? Do I deal with the fallout of pleasing God or do I stay in the safe zone and keep everyone happy in their sin? Easy answer…go with God. Trust me, it’s never as simple as you think it is.
In my head, I rationalized and justified how pleasing a person wasn’t that bad of a choice even though in my heart, I was losing sleep over it. I hadn’t signed up for this fork in the road when I said “Here Jesus, have my sin and wash me clean.” I signed up to spread the Good News, to do missions and outreaches, to lead small groups, to rescue sex trafficking victims, to worship and praise Him. I signed up for the good stuff.
I didn’t count the cost.
I didn’t sign up to have to choose between being a friend and being a follower of Christ. I didn’t sign up to figure out how to deal with my own personal persecution for choosing Him over others. For a moment, I had a decision to make. Was it really worth it all?
When all else fails, He is always worth it. When the temptation and deception are staring me in the face, He is still worth it. If I am forced to abandon everyone close to me and forced to face ridicule for choosing God’s commands over their comfort, He will still be worth it. He is just that good.